Fifty-ish Random Pieces of Advice for College Students

1. Study abroad.
2. Hanging your shirts in a steamy shower is far superior to ironing.
3. Always study at least two days before a test.
4. You&#39re going to regret that personal expense loan.
5. Graduating with too much credit-card debt can be fixed. Missing out on good times, because you didn&#39t want debt can&#39t be.
6. Check out
7. The more social circles you&#39re in, the more outlets you will have. This Bud&#39s for you, Mr. Frat/Rugby/SGA/Chess Club Player.
8. Missing a single party will never matter the following semester.
9. Being good friends almost never means being good roommates.
10. Shirts and pants: recyclable. Socks and underwear: not.
11. If you&#39re going to throw unwashed clothes back into the cycle, hang ’em up and let ’em air out. Do not throw them on the floor.
12. Politely contest every final grade you get.
13. Nothing cures break-up despair like a freshman.
14. Generally, 60 percent of your grade will come from work during the last 10 percent of the semester; step it up.
15. The chances of you marrying that sorority girl/frat guy are the same as your high school crush.
16. Don&#39t leave college without an internship or two.
17. Study abroad again.
18. There is nothing a drunk person won&#39t do at a party when his/her name is being chanted.
19. Skinny-dipping is to high school, as streaking is to college.
20. On spring break, go all out, or not at all. (Yes, Bermuda; no, Panama City)
21. Everyone knows why that lotion is in your room.
22. 15 percent of your DVD collection will mysteriously vanish every year. You will never know why.
23. That&#39s the first time you&#39ve grown facial hair isn&#39t it?
24. Having a picture posted on is like a mini-tribute to your college-ness.
25. There is no reason why you shouldn&#39t be able to get a 2.5 and still party like an animal. There is no reason why you should get a 2.0 and still be in school.
26. Mind the step-children.
27. A disco ball and a Jim Belushi can make any room
28. Hooking up with that person&#39s significant other will bite you in the ass &#39 but it&#39ll be so worth it.
29. The creation of the bar-tab concept is pure genius.
30. It is scientifically proven that a criminal justice major is the most useless thing you&#39ll come across.
31. Go to
32. Never underestimate the vulnerability of freshmen the first week of school
33. … and never pass up a chance to take advantage of it.
34. You know those nutrition shakes old people drink? Hangover miracle worker.
35. She wasn&#39t that good looking last night, either.
36. Your varsity jacket stays home.

37. Wearing a hat or shirt from the college you didn&#39t get into your freshman year makes you look like a tool.
38. If (god forbid) you have a high school ring, lock it up far, far away.
39. The first few weeks of school, everyone will be incredibly open and friendly. After that, everyone will go back to treating you like crap.
40. Nobody cares exactly what or how much you drank last night.
41. Neither what you take, nor how much you take of it, your hangover will still suck.
42. Don&#39t drink the punch.
43. No matter how big and tough you were in high school, there will always be a fraternity to remind you they don&#39t care.
44. Friends from college won&#39t think your friends from home are half as cool as you do. Nor will they get along.
45. Blink 182 is the ultimate pre-game music, Ludacris is the typical party music and “shut the eff up” is the perfect morning-after music.
46. Your schools basketball/football games supersede all forms of religion.

47. The threesome will be the apex of your college tenure.
48. No matter how good the party scene is it&#39ll get old … but playing beer-pong in your room with your buddies is timeless.
49. Maybe dating that sorority girl wasn&#39t such a good idea.
50. Remember how you blinked and high school was over? Same thing with college, only you have nothing to look forward to after it. Enjoy it while it lasts.
51. &#39I was already in here. I just left to make a phone call,&#39 will get you past Mongo the Juiced-Up Door Guy at most parties without paying.
52. Observe the equal girl-to-guy ratio when walking into a party.
53. The kids that have the most fun freshman year mysteriously never return.
54. For every person you didn&#39t like in high school, there will be three more of them in college.
55. There’s nothing worse than hearing about what you did after a blackout.
56. Natty Light = Liquid Gold
57. Ramen is to be eaten, not wrestled in.
58. “The Freshman 15” is more of a minimum than a standard. Get them early.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.