Things That Changed College…Forever

College isn’t what is used to be – just ask your parents.

Between pocket-sized technology and the latest trends in pop-culture today’s generations of college students are a far cry from the sock-hop generation. Keeping that in mind, COED presents a few things that changed college forever, from TV programs to food and everything in between.

The Simpsons: (The SIMP-suns) n. 1. Animated situation comedy featuring the hapless Homer Simpson, his wife, Marge and their children, Bart, Lisa and Maggie. Started out as animated shorts on The Tracey Ullman Show in 1987. 2. Now, wildly popular show among college students, who receive important life lessons from episodes. “You know, bro, Homer kind of reminds me of my father.”

Ramen Noodles: (RAH-men NEW-dulls) n. (pl.) 1. A crunchy brick of dried noodles that, when added to boiling water and a spice packet, becomes a full bowl of steaming noodles. 2. The world’s best hangover remedy, it lends itself to collegiate lifestyles: no cooking, no fuss, no more hangover. “Had a pack of Ramen at 10, and I was ready to cram all night.”

Playboy: (PLAY-boy) n. 1. The prototype of “men’s magazines” that was introduced by nerdy Hugh Hefner in the 1950s, featuring touched-up photographs of naked women. 2. Well known for soliciting the glib comment: “I like to read the magazines for the articles.” 3. In a nation swamped in porn, it’s considered OK to have around the frat room because of its relatively tame content and association with manly sophistication. “Hey, did you know that ol’ Hef was dating blond triplets? That dog!”

Howard Stern: (HOW-word Sturn) n. 1. Everybody’s favorite “shock jock,” who ruled the (college) airwaves for many years … until he was recently reborn on satellite radio. 2. Known for having an adolescent, prurient view of women and sexuality, though he is recognized as a comic genius. 3. A thorn in the side of the Federal Communication Commission. “On the eighth day, Howard Stern brought the world hot lesbians making out with one another.”

Coors Light: (CORES Lite) n. 1. A beer staple at college parties because of affordability and taste. Whether served from a can, bottle or keg, it’s overrated for taste and as an agent of seduction. 2. A product that has yet to match the advertising branding of Budweiser. 3. The kind of beer moms drink. “Heeeey who wants some Coors Light? Just kidding! That beer sucks.”

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.