A Beginner’s Guide to Facebook Places

Remember when you had to pick up a telephone, call a shared number, ask if so-and-so was home, and THEN talk to someone to invite them along to something?  This was, of course, after someone else called you to invite you somewhere.  Instantaneous information?  A thing of the future, man.  And now the future’s here, becoming progressively more and less social as social networking automates all of those mundane human tasks of physically talking to someone to engage in a social activity.  If, despite our suggestions  to stop using Facebook , you are still using Facebook, you might find this latest adaptation of social interaction rather useful for all of your stealing, stalking, raping, killing, or just plain socializing needs.
Introducing Facebook Places, a mobile Facebook application that allows you to update your status with a location for friends, family, co-workers, stalkers, rapists, child-molesters, and the government to find you and your companions quickly and easily.  Using a sort of “check-in” system, you can tell everyone on Facebook where you are when you use Facebook.  You can then find others near you so you can meet up together and gloat over your iPhone prowess (as you can only use this application with mobile touch devices).  Privacy settings, thankfully, come into play so you can monitor to a degree who is able to access this information.  Of course, if Facebook changes their privacy terms again, you can wave good-bye to that safety net as your information is exposed to the entire internet like the last time.
Places allows you to tag your friends, too, so when your pal asks if his girlfriend is cheating on him and the two of you are tagged in the same location, your alibi is immediately discredited!  What further wonders can Facebook Places introduce?  They advertise the ability to share a concert with your friends (which is really just egotistical), or to meet up at Starbucks.  Highly less complicated than a text message…?  More like easier access for stalkers.
If you’re unconvinced as to the seemingly useless integration of Facebook Places, check out the official FAQ and decide for yourself how creepy this application can be.  Alert all of your friends when you’re out of the country so they can swing by and rob your apartment!  Although, if you lie using this application, you could lead some people on a hilarious wild goose chase as you watch from venues across the street.  Alright, Facebook, we’ll give you that for an “lol” factor.  Otherwise, please stop contributing to the ongoing problem of danger on the interwebs.

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