The 7 Best Malt Liquors

It’s no wonder why 40s are the drink of choice on most college campuses. Why would you spend $3.50 for a 12 ounce beer when you could get 40 ounces of delicious malt liquor for half that price and twice the ABV? It’s so popular, the competitive kids created a drinking game called, “Edward 40 Hands,” in which players duct-tape 40s to their hands and drink both before they can cut themselves free. Now, malt liquor isn’t for everyone, but for anyone who grew up watching 90s rap videos, this list of the best malt liquors is for you.

1) Steel Reserve

ABV: 8.1% alcohol

Steel Reserve is one of the better tasting malt liquors. And for about a buck a can, you can afford to buy your weight in alcohol. Steel Reserve also keeps its flavor even after it’s been sitting for a bit. So go ahead and pass out for an hour, your alcohol is safe.

2) Magnum 40

ABV: 6.0% alcohol

Even though this liquor is named after a condom, it’s not guaranteed to get you laid. The upshot of this malt liquor is that it’s one of the cheapest on the market, so you can literally get drunk off of laundry quarters.

3) Mickey’s

ABV: 5.6% alcohol

If you want a malt liquor that will go down easily, then Mickey’s is your drink of choice. The mild flavor doesn’t have an overwhelming after-taste which makes it perfect for multiple games of beer pong.

4) St. Ides

ABV: 8.2% alcohol

This high octane liquor is best for people who want to get very drunk very quickly. The taste is a little overpowering, but if you can get past that, it’s clear sailing all the way to the ivory throne.

5) Silver Thunder

ABV: 5.8% alcohol

Any type of liquor named after a natural disaster is guaranteed to be good. Silver Thunder is the old faithful of malt liquors. The clean taste will sit easy with just about anyone.

6) Colt 45

ABV: 5.6% alcohol

Colt 45 is one of the cheaper malt liquors and a favorite amongst teenagers – and Lando Billy Dee Williams – who don’t know any better. The mild taste makes it perfect to get drunk off of quickly and efficiently. It works everytime.

7) Hurricane

ABV: 5.9% alcohol

If you want somebody to “rock you like a hurricane,” don’t drink this liquor. You’ll end up getting beer goggles really quickly and going home with the largest broad in the room. Pros: Hurricane will get your drunk rather quickly. Cons: You’ll regret it the next morning.

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