He Said / She Said: Faking Orgasms

Photo by Hans Neleman, Stone

He Said/She Said is COED’s dating, sex, and relationship debate series designed to help dudes understand what chicks are thinking – we know, an impossible feat. Every week we’ll be throwing out a different topic for debate… you can read the guy’s side here and the girl’s side at CollegeCandy.com. This week’s topic: faking the funk on a nasty spunk (pretending to orgasm).

I’ve only known maybe 2 or 3 guys who’ve admitted to faking an orgasm with a woman. One said the girl was “bad at sex” (rumors are he might be bi or closet homosexual), another claimed whiskey d*ck, while the last flat out just got tired. There was a guy who confessed he wanted to climax with a girl while having phone sex, so he faked it. Then there was a dude who was with a girl so fugly, he had to finish himself off in the shower.

Personally, I think women fake it more than men. Unfortunately, there’s no real solid numbers to back this up. A random-sample telephone poll of 1,501 Americans showed 48% of women and 11% of men faked orgasm. Then you have an online survey that showed 37–50% of women admitting to faking at least once while 31–48% of men did. AskMen’s survey revealed ~30% of men admit to faking the big O. They also posted a “How To” article on faking an orgasm. My knee jerk reaction to that is: seriously?

Turns out it’s a serious problem for a decent chunk of punks. We’ve told you about ED, but have you heard of DE? It stands for “Delayed Ejaculation”. While most guys can sympathize with having one too many while plugging a fug and pulling the parachute, there are some dudes who could be making sweet love to Mila Kunis while stone stober and hopped up on horny goat weed & spanish fly and still not be able to finish. That sucks. But why?

Below is a chart released by ABC News from the survey they conducted in 2004.


However, this doesn’t break it down by gender. I think dudes fake the funk because they’re tired or have physical/emotional/psychological inhibitions, and I feel women mostly do it to please the partner or to not hurt their feelings. I’m here to say, that’s lame!

Yes, while on the surface that seems like a very sensitive, honorable, and considerate thing to do, it’s just going to come back to bite you ladies in the love button. What happens when he finds out you faked it? Don’t you think his feelings will be hurt more? If I found out my girl was faking it and she was like, “Yeah, I was tired” or “I was bored” or “It just wasn’t going to happen”, I’d respect her more. Let’s BE honest – if she’s faking it, it means I’m not doing my job, which means she’s tired, unsatisfied and/or bored anyway. Might as well own up to it so we can work on it.

Photo by B2M Productions Photographers Choice RF

Would you rather have sex and not have the girl c*m or have her fake it every time? Hopefully, by now, you can tell when she’s faking it. Research says otherwise. You can always read these articles from iVillage, About.com, and How To Do Things (ironic site name), but the truth is either you better be a dynamite actress and NEVER admit to faking or just be real and work on it with your partner.

Check out what SHE SAID at CollegeCandy.com

Liked this? Check out these:
He Said / She Said: Who Should Control Birth Control?
He Said / She Said: Going Soft Makes Things Hard
He Said / She Said: Your Place Or Mine?
He Said / She Said: 9 Things Girls Shouldn’t Do In The Bedroom
He Said She Said: WARNING, Applying Labels Can Be Dangerous To Your Health

5 thoughts on “He Said / She Said: Faking Orgasms”

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