Diet soda may be the most popular (and possibly only) grocery item in any given sorority house. It’s also crossed the gender line as a standard mixer for alcoholic drinks. The stuff is getting popular in the same way lite beer lost its stigma among dudes looking to postpone inheriting their dads’ hops-and-barley bellies.
Alas, the sugar-free pop cocktail party just got pooped (as usual) by science nerds.
According to a new study, mixing diet soda with booze will raise your Breathalyzer readings 18 percent higher than if you stick to the standard sugary stuff. What’s worse: participants reported that, even though the Breathalyzer percentages rose and their reaction times slowed down, they didn’t feel any drunker. And that combination is flat-out sobering.
Researchers experimented on sixteen “casual drinkers” who got wasted for the advancement of knowledge (sound familiar, you soused scholar?). The subjects were given diet soda drinks, regular soda drinks, and a placebo at different times over several sessions. Their breath alcohol and response capability was measured after each consumption, and each time the carbonated lifeblood of fat chicks was involved, the Breathalyzer skyrocketed.
Ever since diet soda hit the marketplace, warnings have been issued regarding its chem-lab-gone-wild ingredients, especially artificial sweeteners. This report actually pinpoints soft drink sugar substitutes as specifically what sends the Breathalyzer soaring northward. That’s not sweet, but it is low.

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