10 Things DJs Should Be Doing Instead Of Pretending They're Performers

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2aySTpJ1uY&w=600&h=350]

DJs these days are making more money than you can dream of–and what are they doing up on stage? Mostly turning keys and knobs while you roll face in the audience and claim that it’s the best night of your life.

We love the EDM culture just as much as the world does right now but after watching this video, we’re kind of cringing. The text in this video is just spot on. So get ready to laugh and maybe re-consider the next time you spend 100 dollars to go see a DJ “perform.” That said, we still wish we were at Ultra.

Here’s a few ideas for what we think these guys should be doing with their hands instead of turning knobs every few seconds and putting their hands in the air…

1. Toss out free Molly to the Crowd. Everyone’s on it, anyway, so it can’t be illegal, right?


2. Text some EDM girls to meet up promptly after your set. No time to waste, boys. 

3. Spray water into the crowd. Those kids on drugs need as much hydration as they can get.


4. Toss candy into the crowd. Hi-Chew and Starbursts are a must at EDM shows.


5. Take a hint from Girl Talk and shoot funny things like toilet paper into the crowd.

6. Entertain the crowd by juggling.


7. Coordinate wet t-shirt and twerking contests. At least those would be fun to watch.

8. Do hand puppets. It would be, like, sooooo trippy, bro.

9. Toss out all the insane money that they’re making.

10. Just stop pretending that you’re actually doing anything besides playing a pre-recorded set.

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